Вэйнамонд -- друг. Даже более того, он, похоже, относится к нам прямо-таки с нежностью. И тут мысль, которая все это время блуждала где-то на задворках сознания Олвина, выкристаллизовалась со всей ясностью. Он припомнил Крифа и всех тех мелких животных, которые все время убегали -- к неудовольствию или тревоге Хилвара.
И припомнил еще -- как же давно, казалось, это. -- зоологическую цель их путешествия к Шалмирейну.
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After the death of a loved one, attending to the niceties of etiquette might be the last thing you want to do. Nevertheless, it's an important part of life to acknowledge others' kindness in times of grief and hardship. Sending a short, simple thank you note is not only basic etiquette, but also a thoughtful way to convey your appreciation for those who were involved in the lives of your late loved one.
Part 1Gathering Supplies
Choose blank thank you cards so you’ll have room to write. Regardless of what style of thank you note you select, look for blank cards or cards with minimal writing inside them. This way you will have space to write, and your thanks will stand out.
Keep it simple. Although etiquette is important, do not stress yourself out over these thank you notes. This is an instance of it being the thought that counts. Don’t worry about sending the wrong kind of card or choosing an ugly stationery. You are grieving, and these notes are simply a way for you to thank those who helped you during a tough time.
Part 2Deciding What to Say
Part 3Sending the Notes
Try to send them within two weeks. General etiquette rules dictate that you need to send thank you notes within two weeks of the funeral. Your friends and loved ones know you’re grieving, so if you take longer to send the notes out, don’t worry. A late thank you note is better than no thank you note at all.
Solicit help if you need it. If the prospect of thanking dozens of people after the death of a loved one feels overwhelming, don’t hesitate to ask those around you for help. Even if it’s sending someone to the post office to buy you stamps or envelopes, delegate tasks to close friends or family members.
Remember that thank you notes are not a requirement. Finally, don’t feel bad if you don’t get around to thank you notes. While they are a key component of good etiquette, during times of grief, etiquette can take a backseat to our mourning. So if you can’t emotionally get through the thank you notes, don’t beat yourself up for not finishing them.
Should I sign or write something additional on a pre-printed thank you card from the funeral home?
Only if you want to, perhaps to a special person or someone who did something special, such as read or sang at the funeral or helped with the wake or something. It is not really expected as people know you have suffered a loss, but a quick line for a special thing done or extra generous memorial donation would be fine.
How do I sign the letter?
As it says above, sign the notes either with your own name or “Family of [Deceased’s Name]."
I have some beautiful blank note cards with my Mother's name imprinted on the front of the card. Since she was the one who passed, would it be appropriate to use those cards instead of using ones with "thank you" on the front? I can't afford to buy new cards, so I thought this might be okay.
Yes, you can definitely use the blank cards with your mother's name on them. On the inside message you can express your thanks to whomever you send the cards.
Who is the proper person to thank for funeral flowers that came from a group?
Write a thank you note to the group, not one person. Send the note to the leader or someone you know that is involved. Be sure to address the entire group, as the note will be shared with the group.
What is the best way to write a thank you note after receiving funeral flowers? Should I describe the type of flowers I received?
Write something like this: "I wanted to thank you for the flowers you sent me. They were very thoughtful." If the flowers carried a meaning you're away of, then you could make a mention of that (see the meaning of flowers) or you could mention that they were the deceased's favorite, if this was the truth, such as: "Thank you for the flowers. They were Marie-Claire's favorites. I know she'd have appreciated your caring thoughts."
How do I thank a friend of my brother's for paying for and preparing the after funeral meal?
I've written something along the lines of: "Thank you for the kindness and caring you showed in providing such a delicious dinner. Your love for [the deceased] was so sincere in every dish - and all homemade! For many of us, this was the first real meal we could sit down and enjoy since s/he passed. Your thoughtfulness is so appreciated. Sincerely, the ___ Family"
What do I say to the undertaker who organized the funeral?
Thank them for their time and compliment them on their planning abilities. A phone call, letter, or quick in-person visit will do.
What do I say to the person who performed the music for the service?
Say something like: Thank you so much for generously donating your time and beautiful talent at such a difficult time for me, it's greatly appreciated.
How do I write a thank you to a Sunday school class for their sympathy and a memorial?
Say thank you by going in person into their class. You could award small prizes such as a piece of jewelry, a book, a gift voucher, etc. to class members who were particularly helpful. Or, throw the whole class a morning tea.
How do I write a thank-you note as a widow with young children?
If you're struggling to write the card with young children around, ask a family member or friend to mind them for a hour or two. If you don't know what to say, keep it simple and don't be afraid to let tears flow.
Ask a Question
Sympathy thank you notes are a great way to thank your loved ones who Death is an inevitable thing. The following write-up gives you a few examples of sympathy thank Everybody in my family would like to thank you for the beautiful flowers you have sent in the memory of (name of the deceased).
Many people like to write funeral thank you notes to express their gratitude for people coming to their loved one's funerals. But bereavement thank you notes can be hard to write, especially so soon after the event when you are still in shock. We've put together some short notes to give you some ideas.
The cards on this page are from our own photos and are available for purchase from our Grief and Sympathy Store. Click on each image for individual product information.
Save money by choosing the smaller note card size if you need to buy lots.
Dear John and Susie
Thank you for coming to Dave's funeral and for the beautiful flowers you sent me. Dave always felt our friendship over the years was special. I have many happy memories of our shared outings together I hope to see you soon.
Your friend, Mary
Dear John and Tammy
Our many thanks for the huge support you have given our family since mother's sudden death. It has helped us through a difficult time, knowing we have such good friends. Knowing you are all there for us in times of need is such a comfort. Hope to be in touch soon.
The Smith family
Dear Tim and Mary
We would like to say a heartfelt thank you for supporting us at Henry's funeral on Thursday. We cannot express enough what a huge comfort it was to us all to know that he had influenced everyone's lives in some way. It helped us to cope at this sad time. We will be in touch with you as soon as we can.
Many, many thanks
Jane and family.
To Dennis and Gary
The Dale family would like to say how much we appreciated your presence at Donald's funeral on Tuesday. He would have been proud to see how all his friends rallied round the family to give support at this difficult time. He enjoyed the holidays you all had and of course the many hours of surfing which was the love of his life. Thank you, he was lucky to have such
good friends. Do keep in touch.
If you have found this site useful, do consider supporting us by looking at our selection of unique funeral thank you notes which we have designed ourselves.
You can personalise them with your own text and messages, and you can send them direct to multiple shipping addresses.
For details of individual cards, click on the images.
More Sample Funeral Thank You Notes
Continue Planning a Funeral
If you are new to this site, then do have a look at some of our other pages which may help you if you are having difficulties coming to terms with your loss.
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Do you feel alone and sad with no support and no idea how to move forward? It can be tough when you are stuck in grief to find the motivation to get the most out of your precious life.
Online counseling can help by giving you that support so you don't feel so alone. You can have someone to talk to anytime you like, a kind and understanding person who will help you to find meaning in life again, to treasure the memories of your loved one without being overwhelmed and to enjoy your activities, family and friends again.
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Our free downloadable and printable document "The 10 Most Important Things You Can Do To Survive Your Grief And Get On With Life" will help you to be positive day to day.
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A helpful list of ideas for sympathy thank you cards and examples of funeral thank you wording to include in a note
Last updated: 17 July 2019
Many people are grateful for the kind words and support they receive during the most stressful days of their lives, and send a funeral thank you card expressing a few words of gratitude.
In the days or weeks that follow the funeral of your loved one, you might wish to reply to the sympathy cards and messages you received.
While it is a nice gesture to do so, you needn’t feel obliged or pressured to respond or acknowledge every person who sent flowers or a card – people will understand and don’t expect thanks for words and gifts sent to express their sympathy.
Grief counsellor Annie Broadbent says that bereaved families needn’t feel like they must respond to condolence cards or messages. Families may take their own time, up to several and weeks and months, to even read, process and acknowledge sympathy messages.
If you feel emotionally ready to send a funeral thank you card, but are struggling to find the right words, here’s how you can thank someone for their condolences. Included in this guide are some ideas and examples to inspire you to write your own personal message to those who remembered your family’s bereavement.
Apart from extended family members and friends, there may have been other people who made a difficult time a little easier for you to bear and whom you’d like to thank. They might have been involved in practical ways such as leading the funeral service, organising aspects of it, or by providing emotional help and support.
They could include:
You might want to begin by making a list of all the people you’d like to thank. If you find it hard to focus on the task, or need help to remember who you want to write to, you might want to get a close family member to give you hand with writing out funeral thank you card messages.
A sympathy thank you card can be simple: a short, sincere note that acknowledges the recipient’s kinds thoughts or messages.
It can be hard to come up with the right wording for a funeral thank you card, particularly if you find it painful to get through or are not sure of what to say.
Here a few ideas for funeral thank you card wording that can help you to come up with your own:
Whether you wish to send a thank you note acknowledging a special friend who was a source of strength, a member of the clergy who helped to conduct the service, or a caregiver who helped your loved one out during their final days, here are some different examples that can be edited and modified to help you write your own thank you notes after a funeral.
"Just a quick note to show our appreciation for the beautiful flowers you've sent. are of great comfort to us as we try to come to terms with our daughter's death.
After a funeral, you may want to send out thank-you notes for flowers, food, donations, fruit baskets, to your coworkers, the funeral director, pallbearers, the organist or other musicians.
Funeral thank you notes can be difficult to write. Please know that you have my sympathy if you are in this situation. The sample wordings in this post are here to help you figure out what to say.
For more general help with funerals, check out the Funeral Resources site.
Use the links in the table of contents below, to quickly jump to at section.
Examples to thank the funeral pastor are in the pastor appreciation post here.
When you are ready, the templates and samples below can help you get started with your notes.
Should I write a thank-you note to those that came to the funeral but did not give a gift or donation?
No. It’s not necessary to thank those that were at the service or calling hours but did not give flowers or any other type of gift. However, If you want to, you can send a bereavement thank you note.
Should I send a thank-you note for every sympathy card?
Dear [Person's Name]
Thank you for your support when my mother passed away. Your comforting words meant meant a lot to me. The card and your note were touching.
I appreciate the sympathy card, note, and flowers you sent when [person's name] passed away. You've always been a thoughtful person and I'm glad that you are in my life. I am grateful for your support during this difficult time.
Thank you for the beautiful card and sharing your story of when your sister passed away. Losing my sister has been very hard and your words provided comfort. Thanks for being there for me!
Thank you for going to the funeral home with me to help make arrangements for my mom. She was very special to me and I am glad you were able to go with me. It's all felt overwhelming. Your support helped me get through the planning details. The service turned out very well because of your help.
You are such a strong, loving person. Thank you for helping me when my dad died. I am glad you came over to make sure I was actually eating the food that was being dropped off by others. I am grateful for your support.
Thank you for being my best friend and being there once again when I needed help. The funeral went as well as a funeral could go and I was thankful to have you by my side. And, I appreciate the cards and phone calls checking on me.
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Product prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability information displayed on the respective Amazon site that you are redirected to at the time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.
7 Examples for money or donation
Dear [person’s name],
Thank you for making a donation to Hospice in memory of [name of deceased]. We were grateful for the support of Hospice near the end of her life. Also, thank you for coming to the funeral. [Name of deceased] shared many stories about you with the family in recent weeks.
[Your name or family of [deceased]
Dear [person’s name],
We appreciate your donation to the Humane Society made in honor of Uncle Joe. Joe was a dog lover his whole life, and he would be happy knowing that more dogs will be helped.
[Your name or family of [deceased]
Thank you for the money at the time of Betty's passing. Your contribution was given to the American Heart Association as Betty was a long time supporter of their research. Also, thank you for attending her funeral.
The monetary donation you made at John's funeral is appreciated. The family used it to help cover the funeral expenses. We are grateful that John had such a wonderful boss in you. He spoke highly of you often.
Thank you for your generous gift given at the calling hours for [person's name]. I am grateful for the monetary support as his passing was unexpected. Your donation was used towards the expenses.
We are grateful for your monetary support during this time. The money you donated was used to cover dinner and snack food for the family during the calling hours at the funeral home. The entire family thanks you!
Thank you for the donation you made in Betty's honor in lieu of flowers. Betty was passionate about [organization name or cause]. Betty talked often of you and how wonderful of a friend you were to her.
There are examples below for funeral flower thank-you notes. The generic thank you for the flowers templates are here.
Dear [person’s name],
The flowers for Betty’s funeral were beautiful. The arrangement of purple carnations and white lilies was stunning, and Betty would have loved them. Thank you for your kindness and remembering the family.
[Your name or family of [deceased]
Dear [person’s name],
We appreciated the roses at my grandma’s funeral. Roses were her favorite. Roses will always remind me of grandma.
Thank you for the beautiful flower arrangement sent to the funeral home for my sister’s funeral. She loved tulips and I loved that you choose my favorite color for them. I will plant them outside soon. Each year, when they bloom, will be a pleasant reminder of you and my sister.
I am grateful to have you as a friend. The flowers remembering my grandpa are lovely. Thank you for caring about me and my family.
The family appreciated the flowers for Aunt [Aunt’s Name]. The arrangement was amazing and my aunt would have loved them. Thank you for showing your support and sympathy through the flowers.
Sending flowers to the church for my grandma’s funeral was thoughtful. The flowers helped the church to look beautiful during the service. Also, thank you for coming to the visitation.
Many flowers were sent to the funeral home for my dad. I liked your flowers the most! And I appreciate that you choose flowers that are not poisonous to my cats. I will enjoy them at home this week and not have to worry about my cats dying if they decide to eat them.
Thank you note cards available on Amazon are below (affiliate links)
click image to purchase on Amazon
This could be for food brought to the funeral home for calling hours, or the after the funeral meal or food brought to your home before/after the funeral.
Dear [Person’s Name],
Thank you for organizing the food for the calling hours. The church has been a real blessing to us during this difficult time. The family loved the chicken wings and side dishes.
The Jones family
Dear [Person’s Name],
I was feeling overwhelmed when [Name of deceased] passed away. The casseroles you brought over were great! I lived on them for a couple of weeks and may not have eaten otherwise. Thanks for being there for me.
Dear [Name of church or church contact],
The meal after the funeral at the church was wonderful. Thank you for hosting the family and providing all the food. Food is such a comfort in times like this. We were able to share many memories of [Name of deceased] during the meal.
The Jones family
Thank you for arranging the pizza for my family during the weekend of my mother’s passing. With so many family members visiting from out of state, the pizza was a blessing. We were all happy to be able to eat together at home without figuring out what to eat. Also, thank you for coming to the funeral.
My family is thankful for the meals provided when my husband passed away. This has been a very difficult time for us. The children were glad to have some of their favorite comfort foods on hand. Your support has been a bright spot for all of us.
The casseroles you provided for the meal after the funeral were great. The enchilada and lasagna casseroles were big hits. Thank you for providing this comfort food.
Click image to view card on Amazon
6 Thank you note after funeral to coworkers
Note: If you are thanking a group of coworkers at the same time, you may send them all one email.
Thank you for sending flowers to the funeral home. The arrangement was beautiful, and I felt touched that the team remembered me during this difficult. I will see you all when I return to work after settling Mom’s affairs.
Dear [coworker’s name]
Thank you for coming to my dad’s funeral. His passing was very hard and unexpected. Your support was appreciated.
I have the best coworkers! Thank you for the flowers sent to the church for my grandma’s funeral. They helped me to know that you were thinking of me while I was out of the office. I also appreciate all the work that was covered for me while I was out.
I am thankful to have you as a coworker. Your presence at the visitation was appreciated. I am grateful that we have become not only co-workers but friends.
You are a very thoughtful person. Thank you for coming to the visitation and funeral for my mom. As you know, her passing was very hard on me. I appreciate all of your support.
Thank you all for coming to the funeral last week. I am thankful that I was able to be away without worrying about my job and if my work would get covered. We have the best team!
Thank you note cards available on Amazon are below (affiliate link).
Click the image to purchase on Amazon.
Notes and tips:
Funeral directors are usually very helpful when the time comes to make arrangements for a loved one. I commend you for wanting to thank your funeral director during this difficult time. Below you will find example thank-you notes to help you get started.
When my mother-in-law died unexpectedly we relied on the funeral director. He helped us with death certificates, cremation process, transportation of the deceased, and filing the obituary with the local newspaper. This is a small list of what funeral directors can do. Read more about funeral directors here.
Another idea for wording examples is to browse funeral home websites that share thank-you notes as testimonials. If you look at the site for the funeral home you use, just be sure that you do not exactly copy someone’s note and then give it to them. It’s possible that they would recognize it as being from their own website!
If you worked with several people, it’s fine to address the note to the staff of the funeral home.
Dear staff of [funeral home name],
Thank you for helping us through the process from beginning to end. We were not prepared for mom’s death. We appreciate all the support from the entire staff. Having food delivered during the long day of calling hours was a fantastic idea. The family was thankful to be able to step away for a bite to eat while taking a break.
The [your last name] family
Dear [Name of funeral director],
Thank you for ensuring all the details of my Aunt [aunt’s name] funeral went smoothly. When she asked me to be her representative upon her passing I was not sure what all that would entail. I was glad for your help with the obituary and obtaining the death certificates.
I want to thank you for all the time you spent with my family. Explaining each step helped us make decisions and feel in control of a very hard situation. Thank you for arranging for [name of deceased] to be taken to the church. Having the funeral at the church she attended for over 50 years was important to the family. Your suggestion to make a DVD with photos worked out very well as family and friends enjoyed viewing it during the calling hours.
Thank you for everything you and your staff did for [deceased name’s] funeral. The room was the perfect size for the funeral and the organist did a great job playing the hymns. Everything went as well as possible given the situation. I appreciate that you were able to organize the pall bearers as that part was too stressful for me to deal with at the time.
We appreciate the kindness of all of the staff during the calling hours and funeral for my grandma. She was a special lady and I am thankful that everything went smoothly. The family appreciated the snacks that were on hand for the calling hours too.
We felt blessed to have you as our funeral director. Thank you for everything you did to make sure that everything went smoothly. We will recommend you to other families when they need a funeral director.
Thank you for being an awesome funeral director! I wasn't aware of how much happened behind the scenes until my dad passed. Your knowledge and expertise helped make the process feel not so overwhelming.
Click image to view cards on Amazon
Thank you for serving as a pallbearer at Paul's funeral. He requested to have you a pallbearer many years ago. I appreciate you serving in this way.
Grandma will be missed. We are grateful that you were able to serve as a pallbearer. Grandma told us how much she enjoyed your visits over the years.
Thank you for being a last minute pallbearer at Jane's funeral. Her youngest son is doing better now, but the grief was too much for him at the funeral. We are glad that you were able to stand in and help out in this way.
Greg enjoyed spending time with you. A few days before he passed, he asked us to ask you to be a pallbearer when the time came. Thank you for honoring his request.
Thank you for coming to Mr. Smith's funeral. We are glad that you were willing to be a pallbearer. Mr. Smith would have appreciated it too. We are thankful you were there with us to help celebrate life.
Thank you for playing the organ at my mom's funeral. She would have enjoyed the hymns you selected. The music played before the funeral felt peaceful. We appreciate you serving in this way.
You are a wonderful organist. The family was grateful that the funeral home has you on staff for funerals. Aunt Jane loved organ music her whole life and we are glad the funeral home had an organ to help fulfill her final wishes.
Attending Scott's funeral was heartbreaking. Hearing the beautiful music coming from the piano was calming. Thank you for being there and playing the requested music.
Your performance of Amazing Grace was wonderful. I understand why Grandma asked you to sing a solo! Your ability to make it through without crying was impressive. I know how much you loved her and will miss her.
Thank you for coordinating all of the music for Jane's funeral. We felt very overwhelmed. Your experience was appreciated by all. And, thank you for singing the two solo pieces that Jane asked for.
I hope these notes have been helpful. Again, I’m sorry to hear that you need to write this type of thank-you note.
You may also like:
Flower thank-you note templates
While it may be difficult to find the energy to write a thank you note after a funeral, Sent or brought flowers (if floral tributes are received from a specific group of has done what in the days and weeks following the death of your loved one.