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Humorous thanksgiving quotes

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Humorous thanksgiving quotes
July 13, 2019 Misc. Thanks 5 comments

Как странно было бы, подумалось Олвину, если бы эти громоздящиеся стены стали вдруг прозрачными, будто стекло, и можно было бы наблюдать жизнь, протекающую там, внутри. Рассеянные в пространстве вокруг него, жили друзья, которых он знал хорошо, и те, с кем в один прекрасный день ему еще предстоит познакомиться, и те из сограждан, с которыми ему не встретиться никогда,-- хотя как раз таких-то могло оказаться совсем немного, поскольку на протяжении жизни ему придется повстречаться едва ли не с каждым и Диаспаре.

По большей части все эти люди сидят сейчас, вероятно, в своих неприступных комнатах, однако они вовсе не одиноки. Стоит только каждому из них сформировать мысль-пожелание, как он сразу очутиться -- во всех смыслах, кроме физического,-- перед лицом любого избранного им в собеседники жителя Диаспара. Эти люди не ведали, что такое скука, поскольку имели доступ ко всему, что происходило в мире воображения и в реальной жизни с тех самых времен, когда был построен этот город.

Людей, чье сознание было устроено таким вот образом, город обеспечивал всем необходимым с безукоризненной полнотой.

I like the irreverent and silly, so these are the quotes that speak to me. Now I now funny quotes for a holiday aren’t everyone’s thing, so I’ve added some sincere, thoughtful, and thankful ones too.  Which do you prefer? Silly, sassy, or solemn?

Thanksgiving Quotes: Humorous & Lighthearted

Do you have a favorite Thanksgiving quote?

Find humorous quotes, sentimental quotes, and thought-provoking quotes about Thanksgiving here.

Funny Thanksgiving Sayings and Quotes

Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old funny thanksgiving quotes, funny thanksgiving sayings, and funny thanksgiving proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.

The Thanksgiving tradition is, we overeat. ‘Hey, how about at Thanksgiving we just eat a lot?' But we do that every day Oh. What if we eat a lot with people that annoy the hell out of us?     

Jim Gaffigan

Archeologists 10,000 years from now will believe this was a sacred feast where gravy boats were worshipped.     

Just Bill

How to cut a turkey the Republican way: give 1% of your guests 99% of the meat.     

Andy Borowitz

It was dramatic to watch my grandmother decapitate a turkey with an ax the day before Thanksgiving. Nowadays the expense of hiring grandmothers for the ax work would probably qualify all turkeys so honored with gourmet status.     

Russell Baker

I'm looking forward to seeing pie this Thanksgiving more than members of my own family.     

Damien Fahey

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.     

Phyllis Diller

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.     

Jon Stewart

When I was a kid in Indiana, we thought it would be fun to get a turkey a year ahead of time and feed it and so on for the following Thanksgiving. But by the time Thanksgiving came around, we sort of thought of the turkey as a pet, so we ate the dog. Only kidding. It was the cat!     

David Letterman

You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out.     

Jay Leno

Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother's tasted better the day before.

Rita Rudner

On this Thanksgiving day, let us be grateful that we were not born turkeys.


A new survey found that 80 percent of men claim they help cook Thanksgiving dinner. Which makes sense, when you hear they consider saying that smells good to be helping.

Jimmy Fallon

Last Thanksgiving I shot my own turkey. It was fun. That shotgun going, Blam! Everybody at the supermarket just staring. Why track them when I know where they are?     

Kenny Rogerson

Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.     

Erma Bombeck

27 Inspirational Thanksgiving Quotes with Happy Images

humorous thanksgiving quotes

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The most awaited holiday is just around the corner, Thanksgiving. On Thanksgiving, we get to celebrate our gratitude in life. Everybody is excited for the festive dinner at night and the Black Friday Sale the next morning. Families learn about new Thanksgiving recipes and they teach children on how to be thankful. Thanksgiving is definitely a day that everyone look forward to, but it should not just be celebrated once a year; it should be celebrated every day. We should always be thankful  of all of the blessings we receive. We must learn how to appreciate what we have and not what we don’t have. Every morning we wake up is a great blessing. We have yet another day to create memories, another chance to fight our battle, and another page in our life that we can direct.  Here we collected inspirational Thanksgiving Quotes that you can share with everyone everyday.

Thanksgiving Quotes from Bible

1. Enter his gates with Thanksgiving and his courts with praise; Give thanks to him and praise his name.

Originally posted by Wellnourishednest

2. Oh give thanks to the Lord, he is good; For this loving kindness is everlasting.

Originally posted by Instapray

3. Give thanks with a grateful heart.

Originally posted by Bloglovin

4. Let us come before Him with Thanksgiving.

Originally posted by Thebfarm

5. Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of Thanksgiving.

Originally posted by Debbie-debbiedoos

6. Give thanks to the Lord for he is good. His love endures forever.

Originally posted by Heartsandsharts

Inspirational Thanksgiving Quotes

7. Gratitude helps us to see what is there instead of what isn’t.

Originally posted by Thestir.cafemom

8. Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never ever have enough.

Originally posted by Homebunch

9. May our hearts be filled with thanks and giving.

Originally posted by Etsy

10. May the blessings of the Thanksgiving fill your hearts and home.

Originally posted by Scrapbook

11. As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.

Originally posted by Debbie-debbiedoos

12. When you are grateful fear disappears and abundance appears.

Originally posted by Thewowstyle

13. Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.

Originally posted by Honeybearlane

14. Give thanks for each new morning with its light: for rest and shelter of the night, for health and food, for heal and food, for love and friends, and for everything thy goodness sends. Happy Thanksgiving!

Originally posted by Cleverlysimple

15. It is not happy people who are thankful; It is thankful people who are happy.

Originally posted by Yourhomebasedmom

16. When the harvest time riches strew our way, Let us all rejoice on Thanksgiving Day.

Originally posted by Savingmorethanme

17. Give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.

Originally posted by Etsy

18. Give us a thankful sense of blessing in which we live, of the many comforts of our lot, that we may not deserve to lose them by discontent or indifference.

19. Be king, be thoughtful, be genuine, but most of all, be thankful.

Originally posted by Buzzfeed

Short Thanksgiving Quotes

20. Appreciate all that you have.

Originally posted by Etsy

21. Be present in all things and thankful for all things.

Originally posted by Gimmesomeoven

22. Give thanks with a grateful heart.

Originally posted by Househunt

23. Eat, drink and be thankful.

Originally posted by Fivehearthome

24. In everything, give thanks.

Originally posted by Dearlillieblog

25. I am thankful, for my blessings are too many to count.

Originally posted by Foxhollowcottage

26. Thankful everyday; blesses beyond measure.

Originally posted by Growingupgabel

27. If the only prayer you ever say is thank you, that will be enough.

Originally posted by Oprah

We hope these Thanksgiving quotes inspired you to view life positively. Let us share the essence of gratitude and appreciate every blessing that we have even the ones we do not know. If you were moved and inspired by these quotes, you can check more at 52 Inspirational Christmas Quotes with Beautiful Images and 44 Motivational Fitness Quotes with Inspirational Images. Let this list be your guide in gratitude and gratefulness!

by toasting with one of these 20 Thanksgiving Quotes and Toasts. how crazy and troubled we feel, we can find something to be thankful for.

30 Funny Thanksgiving Quotes to Get Everyone at the Dinner Table Cracking Up

Giving a Thanksgiving toast is sometimes a daunting task. After all, how are you supposed to fit an entire year’s worth of gratitude into one speech? Don’t misunderstand us — a solid Thanksgiving toast is a necessary component of any celebration, but there's no need for it to be absolutely perfect. You need something that will make them laugh, something that they will remember, and something that will keep the conversation going. You friend, you need something hilarious, like Jon Stewart's line “I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.”

Click here to see the 9 Funny Thanksgiving Quotes (Slideshow)

Admit it: Conversation at the Thanksgiving dinner table can get very stale. Amid all of the mushy, gushy, lovey-dovey feelings, we need a little comedic relief. A like as classic as Arnold Schwarzenegger's  “I love Thanksgiving turkey… it’s the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts” ought to do the trick! The holiday, after all, involves some pretty hilarious (read: ridiculous) amounts of food consumption, family feuding, and embarrassing moments. [slideshow:

In honor of this otherwise reflective day of thanks, we pulled together some hilarious quotes so you can kick off your holiday toasts with a bang. And who better to get them from than some of the great comedic minds of our generation? 

These side-splitting quotes perfectly sum up most of our feelings about Turkey Day, and are guaranteed to get a smile out of even grumpy old Uncle Earl.

For more turkey talk, visit The Daily Meal’s Ultimate Guide to Thanksgiving!

humorous thanksgiving quotes

300 quotes have been tagged as thanksgiving: Oscar Wilde: 'After a good dinner “The funny thing about Thanksgiving,or any big meal, is that you spend 12.

humorous thanksgiving quotes
Written by Vilkis
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